At an early age John showed much potential and creativity (today it's called ADD). Thusly, his grades were "suspect" at best. Although he was 1st solo trumpet in band & made "All State" to boot, he lost his music scholarship when he got kicked out of band 2 years in a row for;
1) partying excessively, and
2) stealing the PA system while performing a live concert. John explains "I got bored during the flute solo".

    He maintained his high moral standards throughout his adult life when he threw away a medical degree. "It was always about them. "My leg's broken", "I'm bleeding", I've got a concussion". ME ME ME!!!!. He also got bored with his engineering degree. "I tested missiles and believe me, blowing stuff up for 40 hours a week wasn't as much fun as I thought. Then theres the 2 X-wives. "I was divorced at age 21, how many people who live in blue states can say THAT!!!" . He adds, "Besides Jagermeister and unprotected sex, the only thing that ever interested me was COMEDY".

    Apparently, he's found his niche. John is one of the most prolific comedy writers/producers working in radio today. John's ambitions are "to somehow correct the spelling of my tattoo" and "to learn how to win the lottery"

   Other notables: "I don't snore, have no hair on my back, I floss AND put the seat down!"